Yes, I AM a Feminist!

how men see women

I am always amazed when I hear a woman say “I’m not a feminist but…” I cannot understand why any woman would not be a feminist. Being a feminist doesn’t turn you into a dungaree wearing lentil eating lesbian, nor is being a lesbian anything to be ashamed of. But so many women seem frightened of admitting to being a feminist. Why?

To me, being a feminist is about being a man or a woman who believes that no-one should be discriminated against because of their gender. That’s all!

So I would like to say “Yes, I am a feminist and I am proud to be one. I consider it nothing to be ashamed of frightened of. It helps me to embrace my political, physical, mental, emotional and spiritual power and I can’t see anything wrong with that!

The Trouble with GoodReads.

A good book

Don’t get me wrong, I think GoodReads is a really good idea but the trouble is that I discovered it quite late and I don’t know how many books I have read in my life but I do know it’s a lot! And the thought of having to write and post a review for every single one of them is overwhelming! I suppose the sensible thing would be to post a review or two a day on a persistent basis and eventually I might get through them.

But, as is often the case with a big job, it is often not the job itself but the thinking about it that is the worst part. As soon as I think about doing it, I just freeze and then apathy kicks in and consequently I have still barely started. When I go into GoodReads and see the pitifully few reviews I’ve posted I then feel guilty and embarrassed. I then start to think, well no-one will read my reviews anyway.

It’s not the physical part of any task that is most difficult, at least not for me. It is the mental resistance; all the thoughts of ‘it’s too much’ and ‘why should I bother?’, these are the thoughts that lead me into getting nothing done. And unproductive thoughts lead ultimately to an unproductive life.

I’m always reminded of the scene from The Empire Strikes Back where Luke Skywalker is trying to get his plane out of the swamp and he says “It’s too big.” Yoda tells him it’s only too big in his mind. Then Yoda says he must do it again. Luke replies “I’ll try.” And Yoda says what is probably my favourite line from any film ever. “No. Do or don’t do. There is no try.”

The moral of the story is that when we undertake a big task we need to be more like Yoda and less like Luke Skywalker. May the force be with you!

The ROW Check-in that never was!

Widget 5

As you may have noticed, I have not checked in for ages! I haven’t blogged for ages and this isn’t really a check-in either. In the time I’ve been away, my beloved cat Widget has died (boo hoo), I have been selected to go on Mastermind, I have been to Ireland and visited my parents and my sister has finally set a date for her wedding. Also, I sent Emily Swann off to an agent where it was promptly rejected! The rejection of Emily Swann and the death of my Widget upset me greatly and so I retreated from the writing world for a bit.

I do have periods where I stop writing, usually when I’m upset but I always wander back into the fold eventually. I’m not working on any particular project at the moment. My specialist subject for Mastermind is Sitting Bull and so I’m reading and taking notes on his life like mad and as I’ve always wanted to write a book about him, the plan is that when Mastermind is over I can use all the research I’m doing now for that.

Goals; what goals? My goal at the moment is to get through Mastermind without making a fool of myself and that’s all for now. But enough about me; how have you guys been getting on?

My big bit/little bit theory.

I had to share this video because I think it is really special!  And it chimes with what I call my big bit/little bit theory.  What I mean is that if you separate your rubbish for recycling then you’re doing a little bit to help make the world a better place and it’s easy to think that that little bit doesn’t matter but if everyone in the whole world does that one little bit then it becomes a great big bit.

I think we have to remember that it’s hard for one person to do a lot but collectively we can change the world.  It’s the small acts of kindness, the little meaningful things we do that really can create change.  The cynics we say that things are getting worse and there’s nothing we can do about it.  But I think that as long as people do small things to make the world a better place not just for the environment for the people who live on this Earth then things will get better.

And when we help others and the planet, we are helping ourselves.  By improving things around us we improve as people and that can only be a good thing.  You don’t have to try to change the world on your own but collectively we can and do move mountains.

What do you think?

The Further Adventures of a Widget


This is our cat Widget, otherwise known as Widget Bongle.  Yesterday she had to go to the animal hospital to have some teeth taken out.  We knew she had a problem with her teeth because her breath was really smelly!

Anyway, we dropped her off yesterday morning after signing the consent form (which I hate doing!) and then fretted all day (as you do!)  Finally the hospital rang us just after five to say there was a problem.  My heart dropped.

Now Widget had had diabetes but she recovered so well that it looked like the diabetes had gone away.  But the hospital said that they’d done a routine blood test before the operation and found that her blood sugar was very high!

So it looks like her diabetes is back.  I have to give her injections of insulin twice a day, its only one unit of insulin so it’s obviously a very small amount.  It’s a good job that she is very good about taking her injections.  She squeaks a bit before but she never plays up much.

One of the things we both love about Widget is that she is a very gentle cat.  She never bites or claws; it’s just not within her.  If something is happening that she doesn’t like she just runs away.  She doesn’t like being picked up but she just wriggles like mad when you do it.  Again, she is never aggressive.

She is such a loving cat and she loves to be stroked and petted.  That’s one of the reasons we adopted her from the Rescue Centre is that she came straight over to us and cuddled and purred and she was so affectionate right from the beginning.

Today she looks fine, her eyes are bright and her nose is cold and damp and she’s moving around fine.  She looks well and she’s eating okay and drinking her water.  She won’t drink tap water so we have to buy mineral water for her to have!  The things we do for that cat!  So her diabetes is back but it looks like it’s under control.

Another day in the Bongle house.

We actually managed to get out of the house today for the first time since last Friday!  Did a load of food shopping and spent £89 (that’s about $120 for the benefit of the Americans) but at least we’re stocked up with milk and bread and eggs and all sorts of other things.  Did it just in time as well because we got home and it immediately started snowing again!

Managed to pop into the Central Library in town and got four more books out!  So much for my idea about reading the books I already have lying round the house first.  Still at least the library books aren’t costing me money.  Now the library have my e-mail address, they send me e-mails when my books are due back so I don’t forget about them and that means I’m not paying a fortune in overdue fines anymore either!

The bad news is that our roof is leaking.  Mr Bongle, otherwise known as lovely hubby, rang the insurance people and they’re sending out a surveyor to look at the damage and decide if our policy covers it.  We’re both praying that it does because otherwise it’s going to cost us a lot of money.  With all the rain we’ve been having and now the snow as well it’s hardly surprising that the roof is suffering though.

And that’s my exciting life!  What about yours?

Re-blogging The Year of Kindness


Firstly I would like to thank M J Wright for his fabulous idea to make 2013 The Year Of Kindness.

Then I would like to thank Kozo for their idea about blogging for peace.

And finally I would like to thank the wonderful K M Huber for posting about all this so I got to hear about it!

Thanks guys!

Stepping out and staying in!

snoopy happy dance

One of my goals for this year/round of ROW is to put my work out there a bit more and I just thought of a way I could do that (with a little help from my friends!)

Someone just asked if I’d like to guest post on her blog and I said yes.  I love guest posting because, although it makes me nervous, I’m always immensely flattered to be asked.  So I thought to myself, maybe I could have a bit of a party blog this year?

I’ll come to yours and you can come to mine.  I’m happy to guest post with anyone one who’s fool enough…I mean, kind enough to have me and I would love lots of other lovely writers to guest post for me!

When it comes to guest posts I’m not fussy about topics because my blog is all about my crazy…I mean varied life so any sort of thing is good.  I’m interested in loads of different stuff but I prefer upbeat blog posts.  Let me know if anyone of you wonderful people out there in cyberspace would be willing to hang out on my little blog for a while.  See you soon!  (I hope!)


My favourite place!

Glastonbury Tor and gate

My favourite place is Glastonbury!  I just love it there!  I want to go and live there some day.  Its such a lovely place and I always feel so relaxed there.  I love all the eccentric people wandering around in purple cloaks and green velvet hats (or whatever else they’re wearing)!  It reminds me of Hogwarts!

I feel that Glastonbury is the place where it is easiest to be my authentic self, I don’t have to pretend there, I can just be.  I see it as a spiritual centre and a seat of learning as well as being a warm, welcoming and healing place.  And whenever I go there, it feels like a homecoming.

Say no to the thought police!

Ben Franklin quote

As ever, the world seems to be full of people who think they have a God given right to tell us what to do.  We get told that we can’t get married if we’re gay or that we can’t have an abortion if we want one or that its a good idea to let a load of armed guards into schools (and what happens if one of the armed guards has a bad day and goes beserk?)

There are always people who think that they know better than you do.  But don’t listen to them.  Only you can live the life you want.  If you’re gay and you want to get married, go ahead.  You want an abortion; have one.  You don’t have to listen to what I say but you do need to listen to your own heart.  Live your own life by your own rules.  As long as you’re happy and you’re not breaking the law or hurting anyone else; what difference does it make?